“Diya! , Don’t disturb me, I’m busy!”
“Busy doing what, Karan?”
“I’m lighting Diya’s ..Its Diwali!! I’m lighting up my house to feel your presence here..with me”
“Aw Karan, you are the best. I’ll call you later. Bye! “
***
“Diya..Diiiyyaaaa….what are you dreaming about? Are you going to come and light the lamps or not? Its Diwali you know! You can’t take your own sweet time!! Come on!!”
Diya shook from her dreamworld.
“Coming Mom!!” she said.
She had been thinking of Karan again. Karan, who was her life and her reason to live..Karan, who always bought the smile on her face when no one else could even try to take the frown off. Karan, who was the most perfect person in the entire world. Sigh, thought Diya. I must move on.
It had been four years since Karan moved out of her life. They had admitted to being in love with each other, but couldn’t decide what to do with their future since Rahul, Karan’s best friend was in love with Diya as well. In fact, the two had been going around for a while and had broken up some time ago. Both Diya and Karan felt that if they continued their love for each other, they would both be cheating on Rahul. Karan thus chose to end the beautiful friendship they shared and walked out of her life.
Diya was shattered. She tried several times to contact him, she called, she sent him mails and messages. None of them were answered. Eventually she came to know that he had left to the US for further studies.
***
Diya got up and set about to her task of lighting lamps and brightening up her home. How ironic, she thought. The person who made her enjoy this was miles away, probably not even remembering her existence. And she was here, stuck in the past and acting in the present, without being able to take his thoughts off her mind.
Tonight there was no moon. The pitch dark sky with little stars twinkling their way to glory ached her heart. She used to watch the stars with Karan as they talked about everything under the sun. She wanted to scream, she was mad at herself for not being able to get over him. She din like the fact that he still ruled her mind and heart and despite the fact that he had not contacted her in four years, she was still madly in love with him. She knew she was the only one to be blamed for it. After all, if he can get over her so easily, why can’t she?
***
She went back to the days when she and Karan had been the best of friends. They met through Rahul, and had been friends ever since. She even remembered the day..it was 14th of February. Valentine’s Day. It was not exactly love at first sight for them. They had, in fact, started their friendship by arguing on a silly issue about the recipe for chocolate milkshake!
Since then, they had become almost inseparable. It was pure friendship, or so they thought. They were almost like twin souls. She laughed when he laughed, he cried when she cried. They understood each other’s minds, thoughts and hearts. They even understood each other’s silence. Karan and Diya were each other’s strengths; and weakness too. They belonged to each other.
They had a lot in common. They liked the same colors, the same food, the same movies, same kind of music, same books..they shared similar views, and hence it was not surprising that they were always together in each other’s minds and hearts. Diya thought of the days she spent with him, they were by far the most beautiful days of her life. They had watched movies, discussed books over coffee and gone on long rides. She very much doubted if she would ever go for a date again which would give her that kind of fulfillment and happiness.
***
A couple of months back Diya had come to know of Rahul’s marriage. She thought atleast now that Rahul is married to someone else, Karan would come back to her. She kept dreaming of it but it had remained a dream. She even sent a mail to Karan informing him about Rahul’s marriage but as usual there was no response from him.
A lot of her friends had advised her to move on. “he’s not worth waiting for” they said. But her heart didn’t listen to them. She refused to believe in that statement. She put up a brave face and pretended have moved on in life. She seldom discussed or spoke about him. Her friends thought she had forgotten him for good. But the truth was that she couldn’t bear to hear them abuse him in front of her. Moreover, she thought that the memories they shared was not something to be discussed. They were always a part of her private thoughts. Every night, she silently wished him goodnight and prayed that he should get a sound sleep, where ever he is. Every morning, she silently prayed that he should have a wonderful day ahead. In short, he was a part of her, an integral part of her that could never be removed.
She watched the moon every time it was full, knowing that he loved full moon nights. They had both shared a dream of holding hands and walking along the sea shore on a moonlit night. She somehow learnt to find satisfaction in watching the moon, knowing that probably he’d watch it too, and hoping that their dream would come true soon.
Oh, and she prayed. She prayed like a saint praying for salvation. She visited all temples, churches and mosques she could think of. She prayed every day, morning, noon and night. She prayed that he be happy where ever he is, whatever he is doing. She prayed that he succeeds in everything he did, and she prayed for him to come back. Come back to her.
She refused to fall in love again. She thought that if she did and he came back to her at that time, she could never forgive herself for not waiting longer. She declined every proposal that came her way, patiently waiting for his return.
***
“Diya, come lets go and burst crackers” said Deepthi, her little sister. Diya reluctantly went out with Deepthi and half heartedly started bursting crackers. In a while, her friends arrived and they all got busy with crackers and sweets. Diya excused herself and went back to her room. She sat in the balcony and started staring at the dark sky, and the countless little stars that shone, brightening up the beautiful night of Diwali. This, together with the hundreds of lamps lit in the neighborhood added to the beauty of the night. She took a deep breath and inhaled the beauty that lay in front of her eyes. She closed her eyes for a moment and thought of Karan, and wished him a very happy Diwali. When she opened her eyes, they were moist. She wiped the little drops of tears away, promising herself not to cry tonight. After all, it was the festival of lights, of joy and happiness. No, she shouldn’t let herself cry tonight.
***
“Ajeeb Daastan hai ye..Kahan shuru kahan khatam…” her cell phone started ringing loudly. She was in no mood to pick up any calls. Probably a friend calling to wish for Diwali, she thought. She just wanted to be alone with her thoughts. When the phone rang for the third time, she reluctantly picked it up.
“Hi Diya, Happy Diwali to you” said a familiar voice.
Tears rolled down her cheeks and she made no attempt to wipe them away. She didn’t talk, she didn’t respond. She just cried.
After all, her patience had finally paid off and her prayers answered.
